Thursday, July 10, 2008
Lenny and Curtis' Search For Meaning: The Thrilling Conclusion!!!!!
When last we met the Baby Jesus was searching the countryside for Pinks lost pig, Calliou, assisted by a crack team of infant crime fighters!
Mr. Swithers, owner of the haunted amusement part, came under brief suspicion but was ultimately rejected for being 'too sexy'.
Mu Tai Dongs establishment came in for a surprise raid
And though the menu featured pork, it was either fresh or salty...and Caillou was known to be a perfect gentleman at all times.
The search continued on.
Slowly and horribly, like a giant neck-wen the approximate size and shape of an obese toddler, a dark suspicion began to take form.....
CAILLOU HAD BEEN THE VICTIM OF AN ALIEN ABDUCTION!!!!!!!!!!
All the evidence gathered thus far pointed in that direction
...and that direction was someplace off to the right.
Now it remained merely a question of which alien, and for what purpose?
The Vietnamese Cacti-Women of Regulus 3 were known to be performing hybridization experiments involving pigs and lighthouses
The Tall Persons of the Greater Magellanic Cloud were known to abduct and cache small smelly creatures in the hollow trunks of large trees
And the Technologically Retarded Hippies of Saturns' 4th moon occasionally took a farm animal and put it in a basket and then flew around in their interstellar biplanes with it for no good reason that anyone would figure out.
In an effort to locate our purloined porcine pal, the most sophisticated technological listening devices known to man were turned toward the stars!
Suddenly a white streak tore across the heavens in a blinding flash....!
IT WAS CAILLOU! WITH A BLEACH JOB!
YES, Caillou...wayward bacon bit in a sea of stars, sorely missed and dearly beloved, had come back, but only for a brief time. As he hovered overhead he delivered a message of comfort to the friends and family he had left behind on Earths' distant shore.
There comes a time in a young pigs life when the urge to migrate becomes too strong to resist. Calliou had finally given in and answered the call that seemed to sound in his blood like a siren, one of the whoopy types that go oooooOOWWEEEEOOOOOOOooooo and not the nee-ner nee-ner ones or the ones that go WHOOPWHOOPWHOOPWHOOP like that.
Yes, he had returned to his point of origin on the dark side of the moon
...to seek a mate.
To fall in love.
To start a family.
And with that he zoomed off into the heavens again
Leaving us all just a little bit older...sadder...and wiser.
Now wasn't that a nice ending for little Caillou? Yes! Yes, it was!
Because you know and I know all too well
...it could have been A LOT worse.