Three Things People Overcomplicate With Rhetoric

The Patriarchy: I'm right because I can beat you up.
It is no more complicated than that. It simply isn't. 

Juggalos: I'm really, really, really, really stupid.
Really stupid.  Just amazingly, amazingly stupid.  Truly, profoundly, just stupid.

Vegans: Animals are people and my eating disorder is a virtue.

Speaking of vegans, please...save the Jethro Kloss 'stand on the seat in your Birkenstocks and pee all over yourself' stuff for home. Seriously, that's just retarded.