This is the sign in front of our local quick-stop/beer cave/truck park, the Super-Duper Mart. It made me feel loved the first time I saw it, lack of dangly bits notwithstanding. Now it just makes me feel worried for some reason. Although the part about the clean restrooms is reassuring; back when we first moved here the Super Duper had a giant rat trap in the corner behind the ladies' john. It did keep you mindful, come to that.
Now I will be the first to admit I have no idea what this means. Ever since this appeared in front of the Super-Duper Mart I look up in bemusement from time to time and wonder if I am currently experiencing a state of 'moooo'. I could be right now. I have no idea. For all I know "Have a 'moooo' of a time" could be a zen koan. It could be a lot of things, in fact.
One thing is certain: what it should be, by rights, is facing north, toward the border crossing.
It is not.
Still, can your town boast a gigantic inflatable blind cow? No, it can't.
Once inside the mighty Super Duper Mart you have a variety of options. You can choose to be startled and yell 'GAAH!', just as I have on a number of occasions upon seeing this goddamn thing...
Or you can buy stuff
Or you can play this:
which, despite the promise of cheese, contains:
If gambling for butter doesn't make your heart race then I just give up, people. It used to have cheese and various sausages inside as well but I think it started attracting mafioso-types so they cut back the high-stakes factor.
I keep trying to tell you this is an awesome little town. If you still refuse to believe me, then maybe you'll believe this, bunkie:
SO THERE.
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